How To Master Your Inner Critic
“An inner critic is simply that harsh voice that spews out negative and fear-based statements that keep you locked in repetitive cycles of pain or shame”.
We all have one, that inner voice telling us when our efforts were not good enough, or perhaps that we aren’t’ ‘cool’ enough, good-looking enough, successful enough, that we havent achieved enough …
A lot of the anxiety and depression that exists today is because this inner critic has worn you down so much, you believe everything that is tells you.
Workforces are holding back, choosing procrastination over progression because their fears of failure, something their inner critic is forever reminding them, gets in the way of real ambition to achieve their own goals, being told over and over they don’t deserve it, or can’t achieve it.
The truth though, is that all our anxieties from this inner critic is actually just trying to protect us from perceived threats … Usually coming from somewhere in our past where we’ve been hurt before, and deep down we want to stop that happening again so anxiety gets in the way.
The first step in ‘mastering’ your inner critic is to identify this voice and bring awareness to it when it speaks to you … see some different types of an inner critic below
Can you identify yours?
- Type 1: The Perfectionist – having incredibly high standards, perhaps unrealistic ones …
- Type 2: The Inner Controller – the fear of losing control is too much so all aspects of life need to be in check, in line, controlled.
- Type 3: The Taskmaster – success is everything, there is no rest for the wicked …
- Type 4: The Underminer – your confidence is at an all-time low because fear holds you back moving forward with pretty much anything
- Type 5: The Destroyer – not realizing your worth, you have low self-esteem and don’t believe you are worthy of chasing your dreams
- Type 6: The Guilt-Tripper – past experiences are always creeping back into your mind, reminding you off past mistakes, hoping to stop anything similar from happening again
- Type 7: The Conformist – you conform to the norm to ensure you are loved and accepted.
The second step in ‘mastering your inner critic’, is that once you have identified which is yours, start to bring awareness to this inner critic. Notice when those thoughts are present, in what circumstances do they arise? Start to write some of the comments down, and then go back and review them. Can you challenge any of these comments? Confront what it is saying, and what it means, where is the truth at this moment about what anxiety has arisen?
A lot of our insecurities come from past experiences, so we have learned to feel anxious and fearful .. but by addressing our inner critic head-on we can find the situation in which we need to heal from it.
Compassion, kindness, and forgiveness are huge factors in healing. Forgiving yourself for the past. Once you can locate these pains, you can heal.
A lot of our pains come from self-worth, so when you have realized that your pain comes from needing to be liked, loved, or accepted, despite your mistakes, once you have accepted yourself, knowing that you are enough just as you are, then you can start to love yourself.
Identify your inner critic, and practise self-love to increase your self-worth and lead a life you deserve!
Check here for more information about how you can live your life more positively.